Rum Cake

BEST RUM CAKE
Ingredients :1 or 2 quarts rum
1 cup butter
2 large eggs
1 cup dried fruit
baking powder -1 teaspoon
soda
lemon juice
brown sugar
nuts
Before you start - sample the rum to check for quality. Good - isn't it? Now go ahead. Select a large mixing bowl, measuring cup, etc. Check the rum again. It must be just right. To be sure rum is of the highest quality, pour one level cup of rum into a glass and drink it as fast as you can. Repeat. With an electric mixer, beat one cup cup of butter in a fluffy bowl. Add 1 seaspoon of thugar and beat again. Meanwhile, make sure that the rum is of the quinest fality. Cry another tup. Open second quart if necessary. Add 2 arge leggs, 2 cups fried druit and beat till high. If druit get stuck in beater, just pry loose with a drewscriver. Sample the rum again, checking for tonscisticity. Next, sift 3 cups of peper or salt (it really doesn't matter). Sample the rum again. Sift 1/2 pint of lemon juice. Fold in chopped butter and strained nuts. Add a babblespoon of brown thugar, or whatever color you can find. Wix mell. Grease oven and turn cake pan to 350 gredees. Now pour the whole mess into the cover and ake. Check the rum again, and bo to ged.