Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Creative ways to say someones stupid


About as sharp as a marble.
A few clowns short of a circus.
Not the brightest bulb on the Christmas Tree.
A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
I wish I had a blueprint for his brain; I'm trying to build an idiot.
An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
He only has one oar in the water.
A few beers short of a six-pack.
Dumber than a box of hair.
A few peas short of a casserole.
Doesn't have all her cornflakes in one box.
One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl.
One taco short of a combination plate.
A few feathers short of a whole duck.
All foam, no beer.
The cheese slid off her cracker.
Body by Fisher, brains by Mattel.
Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
He fell out of the Stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.
An intellect rivaled only by garden tools.
As smart as bait.
Chimney's clogged.
Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash.
Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor.
Forgot to pay his/her brain bill.
Her sewing machine's out of thread.
His antenna doesn't pick up all the channels.
His belt doesn't go through all the loops.
If she had another brain, it would be lonely.
Missing a few buttons on his remote control.
No grain in the silo.
Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.
Receiver is off the hook.
Several nuts short of a full pouch.
Skylight leaks a little.
Slinky's kinked.
Surfing in Nebraska.
Strong like bear... Smart like tractor.
Too much yardage between the goal posts.
Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
The lights are on, but nobody's home.
Has an IQ of 2, and it takes 3 to grunt.
Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear.
Doesn't know much, but leads the league in nostril hair.
24 cents short of a quarter.
The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead.

2 comments:

sumo said...

All good ones.

Kvatch said...

And then there are the various qualifications (my favorites):

Dumber than a bag of hammers.
Dumber than a box of hair.

:-)